Wednesday, 24 October 2012
Today is my Grandad's birthday. He died two years ago and I miss him dreadfully. It's strange, when I think about it, how little I think of him directly, but he still influences so much I do. I still tend to get upset when I really remember him, which is maybe why I don't reminisce that much. But I believe myself to be as strong as he was, a family trait if you will.
I have a tattoo I have designed, a couple of images that remind me of him. I know he would hate that, he didn't know that I have tattoos but its as much for me as anything. I guess that's the point of remembrance tattoos.
Even my new found love of roller derby is partly down to him. He taught me to skate when I was a kid, got on a pair of skates himself to help me around the rink. Every time I feel like I achieve a little more in derby I think of him teaching me. And every time I get angry when I can't do something (last training session, attempting to jump a stool on its side) I know I have a little bit of his temper.
And very soon, I am taking a phone call with a few of my fellow skaters for a roller derby radio station. This am I very nervous about, but I'm sure I won't sound like too much of a ninny.
A small rambley post, but I hope you hug your family a little tighter or get on the phone to them and tell them you love them. And if they're not, I am sorry, but in turn you've already given me strength by knowing that I'm not alone feeling this way. The world is still turning, right?
And lastly do what you love, even if it terrifies you, push yourself and you can only be rewarded.